As usual, people go through an astonishing childhood unaware of their surroundings and gain numerous experiences that they will never forget. But right when you enter middle school, that’s when life turns upside down. I was that one distinct person out of everyone else, but I didn’t let it get through me, I told myself that I am distinct but in the best way possible; I was bringing cultural diversity into the school I was attending. So I survived that whole year and the next, and even freshman year in high school due to the pandemic.
But what do I mean when I say “I survived that whole year”? Is it academics? Peer pressure? Too many extracurriculars?
I didn’t have many burdens on either of them because I was able to handle academics passionately, didn’t have any extracurriculars for a solid 3 years, and didn’t have a strong social circle.
But what I did mean was that I survived a year being different!
In Asia, there are many stereotypical standards that you can’t change, such as beauty standards and how you should dress. In my school and in my case, we don’t think that BUT I felt as if I wasn’t enough, or I didn’t have the ability to get out of my comfort zone. I knew I was very interactive, very skillful, and in the best version of myself but I still continued to be pushed back with my never-ending thoughts.
I’m so positive about everything and will never let anything get to me but the moment I step into my classroom, I turn into a completely different person, that even why I look back at my day I can’t even recognize myself.
However, when Covid-19 spread throughout the globe and affected everyone’s’ lives in the most devastating way, those few months of social-distancing and lockdowns were the best months of my life. Not only did I change my thoughts, and my anxiety of living up to the standards I set for myself. But I even changed how I was before MENTALLY and positively, I learned how to love myself and accept the fact that I’m different but for the better, I should grasp every opportunity I receive and utilize those precious resources, and I should always go out of my comfort zone to explore things I would never be able to.
So to anyone who made it till here, just appreciate the things you got and stay positive no matter what circumstances. You are already enough to conquer all those challenges ahead and your race, gender, background, etc. should NEVER change your mindset of what you want to achieve, Therefore, I want to thank my school and all my friends in school for constantly pushing me ahead and making me realize my worth now. I absolutely can’t wait to step into that classroom again with a completely different perspective; I wasn’t anti-social, shy, or afraid, I just had anxiety of being different amongst everyone. But now, it’s safe to say that girl you assumed to be afraid is gone for the better.